Do you get fed up of hearing the same words come out of your mouth? Are you annoyed that you have to shout to be heard by your children? It’s not actually good for your children to constantly hear you yell and there are more effective methods to get them to quieten down and do as you say. Here are some tips to stop yelling and start parenting more effectively.
Remember that they are children and are still learning. If they’ve not stopped doing something after you’ve told them to, it’s likely that they haven’t really understood what not to do. There is also the factor that you’re brought it up and now that’s all they want to do.
Parent for their ages. If you don’t want toddlers putting their fingers in the plug sockets, cover the sockets up. If you don’t want pre-schoolers climbing on top of the furniture, put barriers in place and explain why it is so dangerous.
Instead of yelling, start giving warnings. It could be “if you do that again, you’ll go to your room” or “do that again and you’ll go on the naughty step”.
When you do give a warning and they do whatever it is again, you need to follow through with it—and follow through until they complete it. That way, they start learning that no means no.
If you regularly give in because you’re fed up of repeating yourself, they will keep doing it. They know how to play you. Stop giving into them and keep going with the warning system.
One warning and then the punishment. If they start doing it again, warning and then punishment. The more repetitive you get, the more they are going to learn!
If you feel the need to shout at your children, find a way to distract yourself. It could be using a stress ball to calm your nerves or you may decide that you need to walk out of the room for a minute to collect your thoughts.
This is much better and you will be more effective as a parent. Eventually, distracting yourself is no longer an issue because you learn to deal with the problem.
Shouting isn’t effective because you’re not talking to them. When you want children to stop doing something, you need to get down to their level and talk in a low, calm but firm voice.
Look in their eyes where possible and don’t give into those cute smiles. Avoid getting angry when they laugh.
Would you shout at your children if others were around? Most likely not. Because of that, imaging that others are around when you want to shout. You will soon stop yourself in your tracks.
It doesn’t need to imagine someone in the house—imagine a neighbour on the street who can hear you through the open window.