Before you start, you need to determine whether you really want to win him back. What was the reason for the breakup? Have you both just gone different ways? Is it likely to end again in the future? Give it some time – you may find that you just want the security of having him instead of facing the big wide world as a single woman! You need to really think about the reasons for the breakup as this will affect the steps to get him back. If you cheated on him, you’ll need to build the trust again. If you just grew apart, you need to remind him why he fell in love with you and what makes the two of you strong.
Let him decide if he wants you back. Give him some space to get over the breakup and clear the air. If you ring him every day afterwards, you’ll seem needy and clingy. Men don’t like this – they want strong, confident women. Don’t beg him to come back to you or cry in front of him. This just shows immaturity.
Think about the type of person you were at the start of the relationship. This is the person that he fell in love with and wanted to be with. How did you change throughout the relationship? What bad personality traits did you develop? Correct the bad and become the person he loved again.
Take your mind off him and go out with your friends. There’s no point in wallowing over the breakup – it won’t help you get him back. Don’t worry about missing a phone call from him. Enjoy yourself and keep your confidence up. He’ll respect you more for it.
Look after yourself. Get a new outfit, a new haircut or have your nails done. These will help make you feel confident and give you something to wear the next time you see him. Make him remember everything that he’s missing by not being with you and make him want you more.
Decide what you’ll say to him when you call or meet him. You want to sound mature and show that you recognise why you broke up. If you did something wrong, apologise and show him how you’ve changed. If he did something, explain that you’re willing to work on the problems and want to trust him again.
He may have moved on or decided that the relationship isn’t worth working on. He may have other worries. Listen to everything that he has to say and act with maturity. Even if you don’t get back together, he’ll respect you more as a person for that.