There are stages to being in love. A lot of relationships fail because the expectations are unrealistic on how the love affair should play out. When a love affair begins the newness makes it exciting and everyone is on their best behavior. As the affair wears on things change as they naturally should.
When you first meet someone and start falling in love you very likely do not share every aspect of your life with that person. You probably do not share your problems or concerns yet. This contributes to that very first stage of love where you and your beloved are in the bubble phase.
The Bubble Phase of Love
The bubble phase of love is when you and your beloved feel protected from the world because you create your own little bubble to live in. This is the stage that all the people that love being in love crave the most.
This is the phase that coined the term “love is blind” because in this stage no one sees the fault of the other person YET and it is largely related to the fact that bubble is relatively impervious to outside influences.
Back On Earth
The next stage is the Plateau Stage. In this stage you and your beloved are still very much content with each other but things have begun to plateau a bit. The highs and lows of the first few months have evened off some.
You have both set up somewhat of a schedule of seeing each other, calling and pretty much have each other schedules and habits down pat.
This stage is when the little things you found quirky or cute in the beginning start to not seem so quirky or cute. In other words the blinders are coming off a bit!
The last stage of love is what makes or breaks relationships. This is the Real Life Stage of love. This is the stage where it is gloves off. The bickering begins over those things that seemed like non issues months ago. Where all those cute quirky traits that you found so loveable start to drive you nuts.
This is the stage when the future of the relationship is determined. This is the stage when most people jump ship. The butterflies are long gone and the real world problems have replaced them. This stage can take months or years to rear its head.
It is a dose of reality that many couples just cannot tolerate.
A lot of times it is when the couples that are meant to be will pull together and face life together. It is a telling time and can be the time where the unrealistic expectations are not met and it drives the wedge in the relationship. Remember everyone is on best behavior when a relationship just starts out.
Expectations are a key factor in maintaining a long term relationship. Keeping your expectations realistic will help you to avoid the common pitfalls in a relationship.